Inspired by To The Mom Of An Only Child – You Are Not A Lesser Mom
by Kara Carrero
Before the age of 21 I had an apartment, a job, daycare, shopping, a child to care for, bills to pay, and about 1 billion and 3 other things to do while many of my friends were partying and still living at home. Of course I had a babysitter once in a while but a curfew of 11 isn't much to be considered these days. It didn't matter anyway. I preferred staying in most nights with her and watching my little piece of me grow. To the young mom who didn't bother to make plans this weekend, you are a great mom.
My birthday was in June and she was due in August so imagine what people thought when I explained she was premature. I developed Preeclampsia 3 months before giving birth and learned that it had been nothing I had done wrong but a rare condition only pregnant women could get and it was common it women under 23. But the things that people assumed and the looks I got when I walked around with my tiny baby were humiliating. To the young mom, if you have ever had to deal with something like this before and have felt this way before, you are a great mom.
At one point in my life I did hit a rough patch and wondered heavily and judged myself to near death and couldn't handle the pressure of mothering. I will not lie and say that I am a perfect parent and that I did not make a mistake but I fought to fix myself to better her life over what I thought I needed for my own. To the young mom who has lost herself completely and fought to come back for her child, you are a great mom.
I wrote in another post how I had been looking for a job that I could do from home for years since my daughter was born. So to all the young moms who continued to push for their goals and careers while trying to do the best you possibly could at mothering, you are a great mom.
I also needed to stay home and just take time to be with my daughter at certain times and could not work and was able to do so in order to better myself for her. I needed time to evaluate. My stress was affecting my health and my relationship with my daughter. So to the young mom who found the resources to take time for herself so that you could be a better mother, you are a great mom.
Unfortunately many of us have had the experience of doing it all on our own. Despite the circumstances we took on both roles and every task alone. We know how it feels to be stretched to the absolute limit. To break down and cry when it's 4 AM and there's no chance of sleep in site. We know how it feels to never be finished and to feel the weight of literally everything on our shoulders. To the young mom doing it alone, you are a great mom.
There are many things that set a young mom apart from those older and wiser but we are nonetheless mothers who love our children. We did not give up even when things got really tough. We did not choose option B when many people snubbed their noses at us upon learning our age and that we were expecting. We brought beauty and love into this world and we have no regrets.